This MSTing was brought to you by Sa&Dy Productions, MSTed in spirit by Dy and in actuality by Saf.

Do you know what? Just for a twist, I'm going to claim all these characters from AoS are mine! Ha Ha!



*The bond of Sisterhood

Joel: For you fanatics out there, this fanfic was written by
Danielle Gastineau, as far as we can tell.  She left her name off
it.

Tom: We can see why.

Crow: How do we know she wrote it then?

Joel: Her name was on part two.

*Jasmine was in her cabin all morning talking with her mother
*Caipra when she says"I must tell you somthing my child, 

Joel: Wasn't Caipra the mother?

Tom: Maybe the family is confused.

*when you were 4 years old me and Dim Dim had a second child 

Crow: We didn't even know you had the first!

*she would be 14 years old now. We sent her to live with a family

Tom: [As Caipra] Which is NOT what we are.

Crow: What are they?

Tom: Demented.

*untill it was safe enough to bring her home. 

Joel: Except we didn't.

Crow: I knew we forgot something!

Tom: Should have put it on the things-to-do list!

*I want you to find her and bring her home to me, 

Crow: I have *plans* for her...cackle cakle cackle...

*She lives in a small village called Liam 

Tom: It's not hard to find, it's by the *oasis*...

*about a month away from Basra"  

Joel: If it's a month away from Basra, isn't it closer to
something else?

Tom: The only thing it's probably close to is Noel.

*Jasmine says"I have a sister, 

Crow: I believe we have established that.

*what is her name?" Caipra says"Her name is Lena" 

Joel: [As Caipra] I think...it's been a while.

*Jasmine says"I must tell Sinbad about this" 

Crow: Why?

Tom: Why what?

Crow: Why does she have to tell Sinbad?

Tom: To create a plot?

*Caipra says"Yes do so" 

Joel: [As Jasmine] Fine then! I will!

Tom: Be that way!

Crow: I wonder when the Genie will show up.  He's my favourite.

Joel: Wrong Jasmine, Crow.

*Jasmine says goodbye to her mother and heads for topside 

Tom: Are they living underground?

*she finds Sinbad at the tillar 

Joel: If she ever looks back, she'll turn into a tillar of salt.

Crow: Yes! SMITE THEM ALL!!!

*and says"Sinbad, we must go to Liam, at the request of Caipra,

Tom: [As Jasmine] You will do as you are ordered or else!

Crow: [As Sinbad] Or what?

Tom: [As Jasmine] Or I will do my infamous Zen Gesner impression!

Crow: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!

*She has informed me that I have a sister 

Joel: [As Jasmine] And only because I needed to know.

*who is living there and Caipra wants us to go and get her now

Tom: Is it just me, or is Jasmine getting a bit to bossy?

Joel: She's definiately a bit too big for her britches.

Crow: Throw her overboard! Throw her overboard!

*that it is safe to do so, Liam is just north of Basra 

Tom: Actually, a bit northeast.

*we'd get there in about a month" Sinbad says

Crow: [As Sinbad]...You want us to haul your butt and your
sisters for a month--no, two, and for free?! What do we look
like? The Salvation Army?

*"Well, really need to get this cargo to Siran." 

Joel: Well, really need to get out of here.

Tom: I see, the new fad is to eliminate pronouns?

Joel: To do it properly, you need lots of fibre.

*Jasmine says"I know, Siran is near Basra isnt it?, 

Crow: [As Sinbad] I don't know.  I thought you did!

*and anyways this is Dim Dims other daughter we are talking
*about" 

Tom: Oh, well then.

Crow: Just what Sinbad wants, ANOTHER bossy and whiney girl on
his hands!

*Sinbad says"Well, I supose we could go after Siran seeing that
*we are almost there" 

Joel: Pushover.

*Jasmine smiles and gives him a warm hug and a thank you and
*heads for down below.

Tom: Davey Jones' locker, we hope.

Crow: [sings] Here we come, walking down the street, getting the
funniest looks from, everyone we meet...

Tom: Ha, ha.

*The crew arrives in Siran to deliver the Cargo, after that they
*headed for Liam to find Lena. 

Joel: Wow, two tenses in one go.

Crow: Oh no, you don't think that this could be...

Joel: Could be what, Crow?

Crow: ...could be EGYPTLOGIC IN DISGUISE?!

Joel: Only if there is no God.

*The crew got to the tiny village of Liam and no more than three

Tom: ...people were eaten by sharks.

Crow: ...people turned Sinbad down when he asked for a date.

*and a half weeks. 

Joel: Like Ninja Turtles! Only more enduring, Ha! Ha!

*The people of the village stare at the crew as they enter the

Tom: Why is this fic suddenly in the present, and not in the past
tense any more?

Crow: Because the writer has no sense of time when she writes?

Joel: Or, the more likely reason, the author sucks?

*village Jasmine says"Were could she be" 

Joel: You mean you went all this way and you didn't even have an
address?!

*Maeve lets Dermott fly off

Crow: Well, that was dumb.  She should better hope he decides to
come back.

*for a while as the crew search. 

Tom: Yahoo? Excite? Webcrawler? Lycos?

Joel: I wonder what Sinbad would search for on the internet.

Crow: Probably the most searched-for subject.  Heh heh heh...

*A man comes up to the crew and says"Excuse me may I help you?"

Joel: [As the man] You're scaring away my customers.

*Sinbad says"Yes we are looking for a young girl 

Crow: I bet you are, heh heh heh...

Joel: Crow...

*by the name of Lena who was brought here as a Baby 

Tom: Why is "baby" capitalized?

Crow: It's a proper noun.  Duh.  Either that, or the author is
emphasizing....something.

*by a sorcerer named Dim Dim, We have come to take her home" 

Joel: Why, through the entire fanfic, have they assumed that they
can just show up and take her away from the only home she's ever
known?"

*the man says"Lena, She lives in that home. 

Tom: [as Jasmine] No, no, you idiot, I'm JASMINE, my SISTER is
named Lena.

*I will take you there"  the crew follows the man, 

Crow: Hey! He didn't say Simon Says.

*when they arrive the man knocks on the door a women comes out

Tom: These run on sentances are beginning to remind me of
something...or someone.

Joel: Only NOW they're reminding you?!

Crow: The Return Of Egyptlogic...hopefully not coming to a fanfic
near you...

*and says"Yes" 

Joel: Have you ever wondered how all these various Mediterranean
people all speak english?

Crow: Firouz invented the Universal Translator?

*the man says"These people have come for Lena, 

Tom: Her warranty just expired, and she's been recalled.

*remeber when Dim Dim brought her, well they come to take her

Joel: What does Dim Dim bring her have to do with total strangers
wanting to take her away?

*home." Jasmine says" I am her sister Jasmine, May I see her" 

Crow: Who's May, and how much of her are we seeing?

Joel: Crow...

Crow: I think the whole "Crow..." gag is running on too long.

Joel: It's habit.

Crow: Nice excuse.  Do you use it often?

*The women calls for Lena, 

Tom: [Singing] Lena, lena bo bena, banana fanana fo fena, LE-NA!

*Lena a young girl with shoulder lenth 

Joel: Oh, shoulder lenth.  How embarressing.

Crow: She should use Head&Shoulders.

*brown hair and hazel eyes comes to the door and says"yes?" 

Tom: [As Lena] I told you already, I don't want a subscription!

*the women says"I have to tell you something" Lena says"This is
*Jasmine, your sister, your real mother is Caipra and your real
*father is Dim Dim" 

Joel: Why is Lena saying this? How did she find out?

*Lena looks shocked, 

Joel: Why? She was the one who told her mother, appearently!

*while this is happening the man of the house 

Tom: Man of the house.  How...quaint.

Crow: What else should he be called? Resident idiot?

Tom: That has a nicer ring to it.

*comes in and says"You Cant take her!!!" 

Crow: Can too!

Tom: If we wanted to, that is.

Joel: I wonder why the Cant wants her.

*Lena says"Why cant they, they want to take me home to my real
*mother and father" 

Tom: She's taking this really well for someone who was just
informed that her whole up-bringing was a lie.

Joel: She also doesn't seem very torn up about leaving her
family, either.

Crow: If they're as bad as the rest of the characters in this
fanfic, neither would I.

*Jasmine says"Please sir I am only doing what my mother asks of
*me." 

Tom: You want to take my daughter away from me, but since your
mother asked you to, that's all right.

*the man says"How do I know you are who you say you are, 

Crow: You have to over 18 to get in here, guys.

*I want you all to leave" Sinbad says"Allright" 

Joel: That's it? They're just going to leave?

Tom: Hopefully, because that way the story will end.

*Jasmine looks at Sinbad as the crew leaves, later on in the
*forest area were the villigars cant spot the crew

Joel: There's that cant again.

Tom: What exactly does "later on in the forest area were the
villagers" mean?

Crow: I'm positive I haven't the faintest idea.

*Jasmine says"Sinbad why did you do that" Doubar says"They wernt
*gonna give her up that easly" 

Joel: Whoa! Doubar! I always knew you were kinda *slow* but I
thought you could talk better than that....

Crow: It's the New York version of Doubar.

Tom: [As NY Doubar] You want I should swashbuckle, or what?

*Sinbad says"Well, we can take her into the night" 

Crow: Whoa!  I don't even need to say anything there!

*Jasmine says"No! I am not gonna kidnap my own sister" 

Joel: What's happening? Is this "Sinbad Visits The Big Apple"?

Tom: If Maeve calls Dermott a "boid" I'm *gonna* scream.

*Sinbad  says"If she comes willingly its not kidnapping" Jasmine
*says"Oh I get it" 

Joel: Took her long enough.

*Sinbad says"Heres the plan, we wait till night fall, Jasmine you
*will go to her window and tell her

Tom: ...the truth about your crummy family.

Crow: ...that's she not really your sister, you made it up.

*to wait till her family goes to sleep and to signal us when they
*have, 

Joel: How is she supposed to do that? Set off flares in the
living room?

Tom:  [As Lena's *parents*] What's that noise? Oh, Lena's setting
off fireworks again.

*then tell her that to get ready when Dermott flys by." 

Crow: It's a boid, it's a plane, oh no, wait, it IS a boid.

Joel: How are they supposed to see the bird in the middle of the
night?

*Jasmine says"What if we get caught" 

Tom: Oh, it'll just mean twenty-to-life.

*Sinbad says"You and Lena run and find a good hiding place we
*will take care of the rest"

Crow: What "rest" is there?

*Later that night the crew watched as Jasmine slowly went up to
*Lenas window she says"Shh!! we gonna help you sneak out,

Tom: [As Jasmine] We gonna help ya, but if ya screw up, yer gonna
get a visit from our *friend* Joey...

*Wait till they go to sleep when they have signal us"  

Crow: Hey, there's no punctuation in that sentance...OH NO! RUN
FOR THE HILLS!

Joel: If it IS Egyptlogic, there is no defense.  We're doomed.

Tom: [Subtitled] Oh no! The monster is coming, we must flee!

*She points to the direction that lena will signal. 

Crow: How does she know exactly?

Joel: Further more, it sounds like Lena is going to use flares!

*"Then wait untill Dermott Flys by by your window 

Tom: [As Jasmine] Wait until Dermott flys by...oh, wait, there he
goes now.

*and then get some things ready 

Joel: Like what?

Crow: Toothpaste, hairbrush, emergency fireworks, that sort of
thing.

*then I will come back and bring you to safty. 

Tom: Safty? What's that?

Crow: A merger between Saf&Dy Productions and the makers of
Beanie Babies?

*Suddenly a voice is heard "LENA!! Whats going on in there"

Joel: Wouldn't YOU like to know!

*Jasmine quickly ducks. the man comes in the room and lena
*says"Nothing" the man leaves she says"Jasmine" Jasmine says"You
*got the plan" Lena says"Got it...Sister" Jasmine smiles at the
*young girl and sneaks off. 

Crow: That...was...all...one...sentance.  Good God.  We're all
doomed.

*It was a few hours before Lena signaled the crew, 

Joel: So they'd all gone to the tavern and missed the flares
becuase they were all asleep under the table.

*Maeve sent Dermott off. 

Tom: UPS or Western Union?

*Lena quietly got some things together. 

Crow: [As Lena] Hm, okay, I've got my handgun, my emergency
rations, my cocaine--I think I've got all the essentials.

*Jasmine met her at her window, while she was climbing out she
*knocked over a vase which had a loud crash, 

Joel: How, exactly, can you manage to knock over a vase while
climbing out a window?

*Jasmine lena out the window 

Tom: What? Does that sentance make any sense to anyone?

Crow: Not that I know of.

*just as the man of the house came in, He saw Jasmine and Lena 

Joel: So the man of the house is God?

*Jasmine screamed "RUN!!!" The man called off 

Tom: [as the man] I get first dibs!

*and started to run after the two girls only to be confronted by
*Sinbad, Rongar, Firouz, Doubar, and Maeve" 

Crow: And Dermott.

Joel: God forbid that we should forget Dermott.

Tom: The Man obviously did.

*the man says"Kidnappers, the Omar will hear about this" Sinbad
*says"Will that be before or after we tell him you broke your
*promise to Dim Dim, and anyways she went willingly" 

Joel: Oh, that makes it okay then.  Despite the fact she's
underage and running off with people she met literally the day
before.

Crow: I could say something here, but I think I won't.

Joel: That's a first.

*the man says"Fine, take her, see what I care" 

Tom: He changed his tune pretty quickly.

*Maeve says"We better get Lena to the ship" the crew find Lena
*and Jasmine. 

Crow: Why did the story switch tenses all of a sudden?

Tom: You mean again?

*Lena says"Sorry about the vase" Jasmine says"Thats allright"  

Crow: [As Lena] Yeah, I'm really sorry about breaking the vase
that belonged to me.

Tom: I get the strange feeling that the last line was supposed to
be funny.

Joel: How mistaken you are.  Hey! I think the story is over!

All: WOOHOO!

Crow: Now we can get back to doing usefull stuff, like, uh,
watching "sliders" reruns on Space.

Tom: That is *kinda* usefull....it hones our MSTing skills...

The REAL End